Translation of my brother in law's job in Iraq

My brother in law is quite possibly the funniest human being on the planet. Ph.D in History, MA. History, etc. He's a genius and the youngest professor at Virginia Military Institute. He's now serving in Iraq, and gave us some insight as to what he's been doing.

SGT Wineman, BA

Duties, Responsibilities, Accomplishments



Maintenance Management (MIMMS) - 0411



-Maintain maintenance records for all B and D TAMs

-daily reconciliation with MT chief on all parts bins and EROs

-weekly reconciliation with RCT MMO on MARES items and LM-2

-work w/ section heads on maintaining PEB on lot

-maintain past maintenance documentation for all serialized gear

-conduct PME for mechanic/operators on maintenance documentation

-track all WIR gear from 2nd echelon to disposition to replacement





Translation

-Get the parts of everything thats broke

-Get gear that we cant fix to people who can

-Let the CO know what the hell is going on with the vehicles

-Keep regiment off our asses about crap that doesnt work

-Keep Forbes from jumping off a building

-write all the order forms for all the mechs who have forgotten how to do it (in truth, I usually do it for them since they are genuinely busy and its one less thing for them to worry about but its technically their responsibility)

-Track all the bad gear we throw away

-Make sure everything goddamn works vehicles, HE gear, NVGs, weapons, mine detectors, radios, tool kits, demo kits, computers, etc

-stock up on extra crap for PMs and minor repair work

-make brand new record jackets for all the gear since 2nd CEB screwed by not leaving any goddamn paperwork/documentation

-*had to learn all of this shit over here OJT, this aint my MOS; had to learn it from the idiot 2nd CEB guy who had to learn it over here in theatre, too;





Supply Admin 3043



-keypunch all supply/MMO transactions on both MIMMS and SASSY (supply) 4/A, 4/C, and Z01 to order all supplies/parts requested by company

-track all orders on DASF (Due-In and Status File)

-reconcile DASF with DPR daily

-receipt for all inbound items in MIMMS and SASSY 8/1, D6T

-maintain paperwork for all WIRs

-coordinate transfer of gear between various CMRs in RCT-2

-review DTL (Daily Transaction Listing) for edit errors/unmatched NSNs







Translation

-order all the shit

-keep track of the shit on order

-if shit disappears in the process, find out where shit went

-pick shit up when it comes in

-receipt for the shit

-get shit to who needs it on lot/in shops

-get shit to the other platoons and to the FOBs





Supply Warehousing 3051

-issue and maintain records for all gear before deployment

-keep visibility/storage of all C/K Tams on CMR

-upkeep of non-CMR inventory in make-shift warehouse on lot

-upkeep of all Class I items for daily work/mission (chow/water)

-replacing all combat loss items of 782 gear of line platoons

-providing necessary gear to company gunny for missions

-serving with Gunny as ad-hoc Armorer

-transport gear to CLB-2 for convoys

-move all parts/gear from supply/TMO to lot for inventory





Translation

-issue all the shit out

-replace shit that Marines lose/break/eat

-chow-fetcher

-store and keep count of all the shit

-fill in blank when Gunny bellows, Sgt Wineman, I need.

-keep Marines from going naked, hungry and bullet-less





Watch NCO

-maintain daytime/watch in the COC

-conduct paperwork for embarkation of gear/personnel to FOBs in AO

-coordinate w/ HE/UT sections for Engineering requests

-represent CEB at COC briefings during duty

-assist Mail NCO with mail pick-up distribution to FOBs

-communicate messages from SWO or other COC personnel to CEB staff





Translation

-Watch NCO part phone-watch/part crisis management

-serve as a body in the COC to get shit done

-do the mainside runs

-unfuck Whitings mistakes w/ morning reports/LTOs/Wolf mail



Training NCO

-mostly done at Camp Lejeune during work-up

-maintaining all training rosters

-conduct last minute PFTs before deployment

-coordinating with line platoons on training progress

-working with platoon sgt on admin, supply, medical issues

-work with company gunny on logistics of all training activities

-keep records/attendance rosters of all training classes





Translation

-keep track of all the crazy rosters of various color and composition for the CO/S-3

-rosters, rosters, rosters

-occasional wire diagram

-more rosters





Collateral Duties

-Assistant SACO

-Guidon bearer

-Platoon Guide?

-occasional Arabic translator

-driver/gunner

-student in CEB MT/HE School of Diesel Engine for Dummies course

-Platoon satirist

-Company Know-It-All

From beaches to mullets in 2 months

So in May I made the big move from Texas to Cali to train for a totally different job. 2 months later I got word that I was ready for promotion, they just didn't know where. Several options were offered, but they just didn't seem right.

Well...now I know where. Kids I'm off to Kentucky! We're opening a new Fossil apparel store out there and I'm the lucky gal who gets to open it. YAY!

Kentucky is a beautiful state--lots of trees, horses, fresh air, small towns, down to earth people, affordable rent, little crime, and no LA traffic. My kinda place! check it out http://www.visitlex.com

My tentative last day in LA will be Sept 20. Then it's off to TX to see fam/friends, then on to my new home...until next promotion. ;)

I'll keep ya posted,

MB